Origins of Cold as Balls and Cold as a Witches Tit

Someone asked the question “Where did the term cold as balls come from and why do they say it.” That got us to thinking about another saying, Cold as a Witches tit. We had our mission.

Cold as Balls

Cold as balls is an interesting term. My daughter even says it! You hear it all the time but most guys then respond with “my balls aren’t cold so what the heck does that mean?” Cold as balls as it’s referred to in the urban dictionary cold as ballssuggests the term comes from “Describing something that is so cold it makes your balls shrivel”. Some say it’s just a new version of Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey. Some references say that the brass triangles that supported stacks of iron cannon-balls on sailing ships were called monkeys and that in cold weather the metal contracted, causing the balls to fall off. That makes too much sense.  And how about the opposite Hot as Balls. Most men can relate to  that one so we’re not going to go there right now.

The only consensus to the explanation of this expression is that there is no consensus.

 

Cold as a Witches Tit

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Back to Urban Dictionary “Witch’s were once imagined as old hags with wrinkly skin and icy blood. ha! So the phrase “…colder than a witch’s tits…” was used during very cold weather. When someone who still thinks this way came into a warm house or room, often, the phrase would come to mind.”

A few sources quote that a witch’s tit (or witch’s teat) supposedly left a marking that witch hunters and courts would look for on the body of an accused witch. Supposedly, witches would suckle their familiars, and sometimes the Devil himself, from this “unholy” body part. To find these marks, as well as insensitive spots on the skin called devil’s marks–caused by the Devil’s claws or teeth–the suspects were stripped, shaven, then closely examined for any blemishes, moles, or even scars that could be labeled as diabolical.

To find marks invisible to the eye, the examiner would poke the victim inch by inch with a blunt needle (called a bodkin) until they found a spot that didn’t feel pain or bled. Discovery of these marks or spots–one supposes they would be considered cold since they were a sign of communion with the Devil–would be “proof” of the person’s dealings with Scratch, so they would be shown in full court before the execution.

Who Told You?

Post what you think or were told.
Are there any other phrases that identify weather (hot or cold)?